From recent origin with Neothink, through my readings, to where I am now.

I have no real questions anymore, only related concerns and the capacity to illustrate my level of progress through identification of it, as I have now chosen to leave the torment of tracking my own progress, day by day, moment by moment. I will start with the top of my level now, state them, and integrate into the recent past(a workable model? hope so)
I will speak to them(the current developments) from the reflective past. From the beginning of my first comments left at the Neothink, Secret Meetings website. I opened to give and leave all my cards on the table, deeply, in the most honest way I could, relative to my unique experience which involved suffrage…understanding after that it simultaneously reveals possibly glaring flaws of naivety, immaturity, and even mysticism unto the innermost members. I understood and accepted my lower level of maturity honestly before even getting my first substantive literature, as comforting reassurance with the an understanding of what you have already spoken to my own value before hand, now better, fully realised. Having carefully reviewed them at appropriate intervals, related to my emotional concerns along the way, I found better course to find my way into the reading and eventually into the meetings. Upon completion of Book I, wherein I absorbed and paid most careful attention to your father’s writings in particular, I found a clear path to the discipline I needed to better insure the realisation of my own destiny, yet, only if I was able to experience them emotionally. Within a troubled situation I had to do this, dispense of a deadbeat roommate, then regather as best I could to the fulfilment of my reading there…able to identify immediately my need to cease the use of alcohol and then also tobacco. In my “special” emotional space , I was able to do this…but getting to that place in my troubled living space, with troubling neighbors, even with my roommate gone, was difficult, seemingly impossible having experienced anxiety for years associated with my rare condition. I was able to achieve the immediate realization that I would no longer drink alcohol, as it was damaging, irrevocably the very brain cells I was using to think with…yet, as I failed to become enveloped fully by my “special” place emotionally(like failing to by barely 1%–the story of my life) I awoke the following morning and knew I had not made my way out of smoking as I perceived I so badly needed to…the grief was enormous…I went online to purchase your father’s book about poker, somewhat interested, as I live near a casino location, to find his words related..”..(when the experienced gambler) begins to loose control, their is the possibility that all of his discipline will collapse….”like an ex-smoker, reaching for a cigarette”…confirming all my grief and despair which I have felt on many occasions along my journey with Neothink until now; Referencing back to your father’s writing about “variations” to the appropriate and exact course of our development and evolution…our own honesty which led us to become involved with the Society to begin with, speaks to us through rough reality as much as it does through fine tuned, beautiful experiences…(oh,.. the Joy, Sorrow, Relief, simultaneously) speaks all the more to our loyalty to it(Indeed we eventually become 3 dimensionally engrafted) My own emotional need to affirm Life unto my experience at all times throughout my experience of developing, learning, evolving, powerfully spoke to me through Reality itself, however chaotic, disturbing or graphically fearful. The reality is this: we all as human beings are vulnerable, within and without…yet the powerful presence of Consciousness is able to speak to us even in urgent crisis to lead us back to our proper course and remembrance, sustaining us all throughout.
Into book II, the 12 visions and Vision Climax, I was immediately enlivened from the very beginning starting with Friday-night Essence. I enjoyed most of all, the writings of Ray Kotobuki on Neothink, the Philosophical Zero. This really topped it off for me, though left me searching for clues to a code(I was pondering the 10 second miracle mentioned earlier in letters), a code that might speak to the mystery of Consciousness’ own capacity to identify whatever we need to know according to what we really want…no fret there, wasn’t really concerned.
Receiving Miss Annabelle’s was timely “providential”(as they say where I come from) to the split second to avoid a catastrophe of going into my meeting before having read it…some unlevelled misunderstanding has developed with regards to timing of my mailings, even with which literature piece(I now have an additional copy of book I, with no regrets)…the mail arriving that day with the book, in the nick of time…I thought to check for no apparent reason, minutes before contemplating going to the first meeting.
(Apologies for being long, if burdensome–my crucial chance to relate my development/progress…really don’t want to understate here)
Engrossed into the story, following Miss Annabelle and her students through metamorphosis from children into Zons, I gathered more and more vital integrations to my own real Life(could hardly keep up with my own writing)…the factional stimulations of revelation through until the end of the reading lead me to a better place altogether, identifying key developments in the evolution of my thinking as well as the learning process used to get there…I have identified here my latest level of developments. Most of them really came together toward the end of the reading, especially with regard’s to Ian’s final discoveries: “I”ness, unable to comfortably know itself without its full awareness— spoke directly to an infirmity I lived with for many years–our awareness(identified as spirit by Ian) has capacity far beyond our own consciousness, and along with Self in its I-ness, has 3 dimensions: Self, suffers incrimination then, discovers affirmation of it’s own honesty unto identify…I say “3 dimensions” in reference to the “double edged sword” metaphor referenced from Holy Book, realizing it was not fully enough to relate to our real life experience as surely as Mass and Energy are not sufficient to identify the nature of our universe without the controlling element of consciousness…3 dimensions implies incrimination to Self, intellectually, consciously, and now, fully, emotionally through our subconscious essence. The Self’s urgent need is always to identify, while awareness’s need, is to gather more and more integrations from realms beyond…improper relations, one to the other now imposes disintegration upon Self bodily, in that very moment, where awareness, seemingly acting on its own, ceases not to integrate analysis of thought, drawing emotional attention from Self’s work of identifying and producing at that very moment…now in disagreement about what is most relevant to all concerns…the only way they will find unification is through the greater imposition and now full incrimination of
Reality…hence loyalty to honesty, evolves into, honesty to reality, finally, Real unto Reality…to realise the proper base of its own existence…where the presence of hard working, good others(we, improperly unaware of) jolts us into our common place of awareness, where self esteem does not misconstrue to realize most of all, Respect for others in the moment, which is also the greatest respect for all reality… we as individuals, perhaps can never be fully aware…”Are you Real?”–is the only, most important question others ask, first and last–implying now, not only our honesty, but commitment to justice…their only great concern at the moment. Only in the state of doing Justice, Real unto Real, do we now know who we are fully. Identity, fully unified as I-ness, committed with resolve to enact our own creations with Vision, Relevance and Heartfelt passion…(it was a lot of work to get that far, integrating absorbed material with thoughts unto my real)
Now, just a few days since then, I have progressed further: as surely as I professed to myself and others long ago, “Get out of the book and into your own, real Life”…I realized I may now come out of my own writings, and the obsessive need to do so…back into my own mind, fully capable of realizing/remembering and even tracking all the details, consciously and subconsciously with the help of awareness….I have sensed Evo–rapidly evolving Intelligence to take me where I’ve not yet gone, with the comforting assurance, that Intelligence (IQ), is completely invisible to emotion, and can take us immediately to where we want or need without others knowing or tending. At the same time, Self calls me directly into G-think(God think) to a beautiful, subconscious place, where all relevant knowledge, becomes 3 D embodied into us– soul/body/mind with a Visage of all knowledge and Beauty, while incomprehensible, it is also morally and ethically pure, so much so that a little child can understand.

The latest, best, perhaps most vital development to me personally, is a real conversion to my downstream…my life has been set up that way now for many months, but emotions themselves, clearly directed upstream, inflicting enormous stress to keep up with my own vision…like Ian, in the time of his failure to realize(the problem posed to Immortality)…I had to go outward to my awareness to find what Self does not know in the moment…at the moment… even, past the moment…awareness, most comfortable in Eternity always, finds/gathers whatever is needed, speaking to the obvious: a full dimension Self could have realized all along(Ian’s own realization, explained in chap. 123)
My own flow of consciousness is able to flow harmoniously with a rhythm of its own motion, no matter what circumstance, no matter what crisis or concern…like a noisy thoroughbred motor that at least settles into a harmonious tone, consistent with its own chassis….I see how I may have peace, and soon, full, bodily rest.
I feel I will soon be fully empowered with a unified mind, able to comprehend anything, do whatever it wants and go wherever it needs to.
Love…(is)simple, (whether)in more, or (in)less, seemingly active or no, (it)is my ticket…the railway to my own destinations, alive also in the Ocean of Understanding, and solidified with Just Stability into the Rock of my own Existence. We may travel with wings to fly into unknown spiritual realms, or by rail across into further and further frontiers or swim into the deepest depths of understanding …..wherever we want or need to go, we go with the memory of our Origin, the Good Earth, out of which we were formed as human beings.

Speaking to the other members a moment who may be intrigued by the mention of my supposed, “secret language” I used to gain mind space for myself, (mentioned in my original comment, SSMeetings website) It is no mystery, simply a form of identification and verification with Consciousness itself, that, a as matter of its own, started out as crudely as Neanderthal Man himself…until I began to gain clear evidence that I was indeed having conversations, moments at a time, at regular, appropriate intervals…I needed it to escape the imposing and dominant force of my own religious upbringing and its historical context, without which I would never have gained either my freedom or my sanity. Unto me, it was the only way to escape from illusion into reality.
I am now doing research into one of my greatest concerns…the matter of future historical events spoken to by religion and mythology in the context of our real origin, historically. I am relieved to discover that Judaism in its purest form, relates to the greater understanding of God, descriptively identified as the One chosen by Abraham unto himself, a single manifestation of Essence, integrated from a wider, larger field of Energy…always present through love. known or unknown to us(Ian identifies in chap. 123, along with Jake’s reflective realisations of Love as consciousness, later). We may all be assured that our realisations of Zon in no wise contradict our religious, mythological, or spiritual origins, but flow
freely and naturally from them.
Tomorrow, we are not the same people we were
yesterday, moving through time and space, whether we intend it or not, our motion indicates either stagnation or evolvement, with either becoming inevitable, depending upon the honesty of our own realizations…to see, especially we of Neothink, that our progress, even unknown to us, is irrevocable, just as Dr. Wallace said.
I am most happy to be joined with the Society, and potentially, the C of U. Membership with is now vial and joining with the greater C of U, inevitable. For me, I am vested, soon to be enabled, and thereafter, irrevocably to be identified.
We may move without fear into our futures to bring stability into our chaotic world, assured by our goodness and values.
Mark is right in saying, not to expect immediate realization of our future destinies. We are able to realize them eternally within ourselves, without which, they do not really exist … however long it takes to eventually realize them, when they do become, it is because they already have been.

Only one related question to Mark himself: is my material valid, relative, and, logically illustrated, appropriately?

Ironically, I am looking at the screen below where I verify words in the box, to finally send off this long message…it says, “forcing tomorrow”

am I really pushing here beyond extreme tolerance?

sending…the grief of my toil is my own concern, the inappropriateness of it I leave in your hands, and beg pardons from the other members.

Ronald Nieboer