Amazed but still wondering…

Thank you so much for selecting me to be a member. I still to this day do not know how and why you found me but I am truly glad you did. When will I be able to physically meet with one or more of you? I would really like to shake Mr. Hamilton’s hand, and to ask him “Specifically how and why did you pick me?” I am medically retired from the USAF and due to my symptoms of a 500lb inert practice bomb falling on my head I am unable to concentrate more than a hour at a time, which makes me unable to keep a job at all. Right now financially, I am treading water barely. I have had to take money off of bills and one time I had to take out money out of the grocery budget to purchase the Heirloom Packages. I am glad I did, but I am at the point in my life I am tired of being behind in-well…everything. I cannot afford to buy the latest manuscript due to being behind on my house, power bill, and a couple of other bills too. I need help please. I am ashamed I have to but I am at the end of my rope. I just lost my Dad and Grandfather in the span of 10 days in January and dealing with all the events that go with it has left me broke with about $30 in the bank til March. I really do not see the end of the tunnel. Is there any way I can talk to someone to lift my spirits?